AA on the Fylde

How the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous can help those concerned about
someone else's drinking in the Blackpool, Fylde & Wyre area.
(Bispham, Blackpool, Cleveleys, Fleetwood, Kirkham, Lytham, Lytham St Annes, Poulton, Thornton and Wesham.)

Home >> For those concerned about another's problem drinking

This page offers guidance for partners, relatives, friends, colleagues and advisers of the problem drinker who are hoping that Alcoholics Anonymous may be able to help their problem drinker.

Before considering any action designed to motivate the problem drinker to seek help from us, please note that:

1. Alcoholics Anonymous is concerned with how to stay sober and lead a productive and meaningful life.
   We have no medical expertise or detox facilities and cannot advise about stopping drinking or the use of medication. The problem drinker may need medical support and supervision to come off alcohol and that is outside the scope of A.A.
    
2. Alcoholics Anonymous does not charge any fees.
   The fellowship is financially self-supporting and members give freely of their time to help the newcomer
     
3. There is no waiting list.
   There are 27 groups in operation on the Fylde, meeting every week . Since we do not keep any records it is impossible to know how many active A.A. members there are on the Fylde but it must be in excess of 200. This is a substantial resource.
    
   
4. The only requirement for membership of Alcoholics Anonymous is a desire to stop drinking.
   We accept that some drinkers need time to actually come to the decision to stop and the problem drinker does not have to stop before coming to AA. Obviously, we would prefer the problem drinker to be sober when attending meetings.  Most meetings will tolerate a mildly inebriated person but they will not tolerate disruptive behaviour and such a drunk will be asked to leave, usually accompanied by the suggestion that they should come back another time.

The following 4 suggestions are in no order of preference:-

Suggestion: Ask your problem drinker to telephone A.A.

Storyboard explanation of how the help line operates

You can suggest to them that they have a problem with alcohol and should ring the AA help line: 0845 769 7555 or contact us by email at help@alcoholics-anonymous.org.uk Unfortunately, this suggestion implies that they are alcoholics and most problem drinkers will react strongly against this suggestion. The problem drinker is more likely to take this from a professional adviser, employer or friend than a loved one. If your problem drinker is a loved one, please be sure that you are physically safe to make this suggestion.  At the very least they may protest that their problems are "different" and that A.A. is not necessary or desirable for them. Such drinkers often point out that they are a long way from the bottom and what they consider to be "the bottom" keeps getting lower and lower. Or they may simply continue to insist that they can stay sober on their own.  "Is there an alcoholic in your life?" is a pamphlet designed to help you with this dilemma and is available from our on-line literature shop.

Getting the problem drinker to contact the help line whilst you are in the room may seem more effective and at least you know that they have done it! This is often done. It is also quite common for the concerned person to ring A.A. for their problem drinker and then pass the telephone to them once contact has been made. These attempts at coercion are effective in that the problem drinker does end up in an A.A. meeting. However, not being convinced that they have a problem, they are likely to return with all manner of objections, so we make the following suggestion.

Suggestion: Find out about the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous and its' program of recovery

Click on the images to see online versions of this literature. Paper copies of this literature can be obtained from our on-line literature shop.

• "Who me?" and "Is AA for you?" contain self test questionnaires that enable the problem drinker to test whether or not they do indeed have a problem.
• "A newcomer asks" attempts to answer the most common questions asked by the newcomer to AA.
• "15 points" for an alcoholic to consider when confronted with the urge to take a drink.
• "Now that you have stopped" contains tips for making initial sobriety easier.
• The book entitled "Alcoholics Anonymous" is the basic text of the fellowship. It contains the original description of the recovery program and stories of alcoholics. It was written at the beginning of AA when there were few meetings and was intended to be a self-help book of recovery. It could still be used like that today.

Together, this literature will give you a good idea of the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous and its' program of recovery. You could also give it to your problem drinker.

This literature can also be obtained from most meetings, so our next suggestion is that you go to an open meeting of alcoholics anonymous.

Suggestion: Go to an open meeting, with or without your problem drinker

There is nothing like experiencing the real thing for yourself and talking to recovering alcoholics. Some meetings are classed as "open" specifically with your needs in mind. You can go to an open meeting and feel free to tell the members why you are there.

Groups hold their meetings at the same time and place each week. In the Blackpool, Fylde & Wyre areas there many open meetings and these can be located using our meetings finder. You can also download a list of meetings.

So far, we have shown you that there is a lot of help available to the problem drinker. However, there is also similar support available to you, which leads us to our last suggestion...

Suggestion: Contact Al-Anon Family Groups

Loved ones of A.A. members and problem drinkers meet regularly to exchange experiences and viewpoints on the problems of alcoholism. They are part of what is known as Al-Anon Family Groups. Among these are Alateen groups, for teenagers who have alcoholic parents. Al-Anon is not affiliated with AA, but its contribution to increased understanding of the A.A. recovery program has been substantial. They believe alcoholism is a family illness and that changed attitudes can aid recovery.

These changed attitudes will enable you to better cope with the problem drinker and this alone often results in the problem drinker going to A.A.

Let us end this page by using the conclusion in the pamphlet: "Is there an alcoholic in your life?"

Last update: 13th November 2011